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You know you're Japanese American if...
Friday. 3.26.04 9:46 pm
I found this funny...and very true.

-You know that Camp doesn’t mean a cabin in the woods. yup
-The men in your family were gardeners, farmers or produce workers. We owned a strawberry farm for most of my life in Arroyo Grande
-The women in your family were seamstresses, domestic workers or farm laborers. yup
-Your Issei grandparents had an arranged marriage. yup
-One of your relatives was a "picture bride." yup
-You have Nisei relatives named Tak, Tad, George, Harry or Shig. Tak, Tad, George and Shig
-You have Nisei relatives named Keiko, Aiko, Sumi or Mary. Keiko and Mary
-You’re Sansei and your name is Janice, Glen, Brian, Bill or Kenji. I'm a yonsei... but we have Sansei's named Brian and Janice
-You’re thinking of naming your Yonsei child, Brittany, Jenny, Lauren,Garett or Brett, with a Japanese middle name. We have a Garrett, and everyone has japanese middle names.
-All of your cousins are having hapa kids. well, most of them.
-You have relatives who live in Hawaii. yup
-You belong to a Japanese credit union my stepdad does
-Wherever you live now, you always come home to the Obon festival. Yeah, I go down to San Luis Obispo
-The bushes in your front yard are trimmed into balls. My grammas house does
-You have a kaki tree in the backyard. I don't think so...
-You have at least one bag of sembei in the house at all times. not sure.
-You have a Japanese doll in a glass case in your living room. yup
-You have a nekko cat in your house for good luck. yup
-You have large Japanese platters in your china cabinet. yup
-You have the family mon and Japanese needlepoint on the wall. at my gmas house
-You own a multicolored lime green polyester patchwork quilt. gma
-Your grandma used to crochet all your blankets, potholders and dishtowels. yuup!
-You check to see if you need to take off your shoes at your JA friends’ houses. I just do it anyway... has anyone noticed that?
-When you visit other JAs, you give or receive a bag of fruits or vegetables. yup
-When you visit other JAs, you know that you should bring omiage. i didn't know that.
-When you leave a JA house, you take leftover food home on a paper plate or a Styrofoam meat tray. it's a terrible unwritten law.
-You keep a supply of rubber bands, twist ties, butter and tofu containers in the kitchen. yup
-You have an air pump thermos covered with lilacs. no... its red
-You know that Pat Morita doesn’t really speak like Mr. Miyagi. nope
-You’re mad because Kristi Yamaguchi should have gotten more commercial endorsements than Nancy Kerrigan. i met kristi yamaguchi once... her dad lives in Arroyo Grande with my g-parents
-You know someone who has run for the Nisei Queen Pageant. i think i have a cousin that did...
-When your back is sore, you use Tiger Balm or that flexi-stick with the rubber ball on the end that goes, "katonk," "katonk." yup
-After funerals, you go for Chinameshi. no
-After giving koden, you get stamps in the mail. ?
-You fight fiercely for the check after dinner. HAHA thats soo funny!
-You’ve hidden money in the pocket of the person who paid for dinner. my mom puts it in their purse or car... or offers to pay for dessert
-You don’t need to read the instructions on the proper use of hashi. you kidding me? I was born with those skills! too bad meggie wasn't.
-You know that Benihana’s isn’t real Japanese food. yup, but its good.
-You eat soba on New Year’s Eve. i LOVE soba
-You start off the new year with a bowl of ozoni for good luck and the mochi sticks to the roof of your mouth. always.
-You know not to eat the tangerine on the top of the mochi at New Year’s. i got in trouble when i was little for taking it off. oops.
-You have a 12-pack of mochi in your freezer—that you still refuse to throw away in July. theres only 10 left...
-You pack bento for road trips. yup
-Your grandma made the best sushi in town. quite possibly
-You cut all your carrots and hot dogs at an angle. i thought everyone did that...
-You know the virtues of SPAM. yeah, but i think spams disgusting.
-You were eating Chinese chicken salad, years before everyone else. =)
-You know what it means to eat "footballs." my favorite
-You grew up eating ambrosia, wontons and finger Jell-O at family potlucks. no... i can live without that stuff
-You always use Best Foods mayonnaise and like to mix it with shoyu to dip broccoli. no, i put it on artichokes.
-You use the "finger method" to measure the water for your rice cooker. that's how you're supposed to..
-You grew up on rice: bacon fried rice, chili rice, curry rice or red rice. everyday all of my life.
-You like to eat rice with your spaghetti. yup
-You can’t start eating until you have a bowl of rice. you should've seen me at the Korean restaurant the other day.
-You use plastic Cool Whip containers to hold day-old rice. we upgraded to rubbermaid.
-You like to eat your rice in a chawan, not on a plate. yup
-Along with salt and pepper, you have a shoyu dispenser at your table. and wasbi!
-You have a jar of takuan in your fridge. yup
-You buy rice 25 pounds at a time and shoyu a gallon at a time. costco BAYYBEEE
-Natto: you either love it or hate it. hate it
-As a kid, you used to eat Botan rice candy. still do
-You know the story of Momotaro. is that the peach boy?
-You have a pet named Chibi or Shiro. a fish named chibi... wayyy before shark and tweak.
-Someone you know, owns an Akita or Shiba dog. yup
-You went to J-school and your best subject was recess. nope
-At school, you had those Hello Kitty pencil boxes and sweet smelling erasers. not the erasers.... but i did have the boxes
-When you’re sick, you eat okayu. no
-Milk makes you queasy and alcohol turns your face red. I like milk, but alcohal makes me really red, after like 4 sips.
-Your dad owns a Member’s Only jacket. no
-Someone you know drives an Acura Integra, Honda Accord or Toyota Camry. we have an acura and a toyota...
-You used to own one of those miniature zori keychains yupp... i collected them. i wonder where they went...
-You have a kaeru frog or good luck charm hanging in your car. my bedroom.. =)
-Your parents compare you to their friends’ kids. OMG you have NO idea
-You hang on to the illusion that you are superior to other Asians. what? I do not! =/
-Your dentist, doctor and optometrist is Japanese American. my dentist is. heh heh
-You socialize with groups of eight or more people. uhh. more like 2... we have like no people in our school.
-Whenever you’re with more than three people, it takes an hour to decide where to eat. i never noticed that until just now.
-You and your friends call yourselves "Buddaheads," but don’t like it when white people do. nah... not buddhist enough,
-You’ve heard your name pronounced a half-dozen different ways. yup
-You know that E.O. 9066 isn’t a zip code. sure?
-You’re not superstitious but you believe in bachi. yup
-You never take the last piece of food on a plate—but will cut it into smaller pieces. i don't do that. i think thats rude.
-As much as you want it, never ever take the last—anything. Enryo, enryo, enryo. never never never!!!

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